15 Oct Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy

By: Phil Waldron, CEO

“Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy” is the title of a book that Donna and I have just finished reading. The book argues that lament is a neglected but essential dimension of the Christian life, a way to bring sorrow to God in the fallen world.  Personally, I didn’t realize that 65 of the 150 Psalms fall into the category of lament psalms.

I think I speak for both Donna and myself when I say you should read this book. The Bible study that it led me through seemed to fill a huge, missing peace in my personal theology. It has helped me with my own spiritual life, and it has helped me be a more effective preacher as well. Donna and I, and our family, have faced a long decade of very difficult circumstances. While I have never been tempted to doubt the goodness of God or His love for me; I have spent months at a time feeling like I was alone and far from God. I have been so discouraged at times that being in presence of other people who were happy or worshipping with great joy left me feeling like a visitor from Mars.

After reading Mark Vroegop’s study on lamenting before God, I had an ‘aha!’ moment. It seemed to be the missing piece of the puzzle. I should have known, and perhaps subconsciously I did, but it hit me as something new and wonderful to know that I can express any and all of my emotions to God and He listens and He cares. I am now asking myself how did I not learn this so many years before?

Perhaps you are aware of how to lament before God; I hope so. These last ten years have been so very difficult for us with tragedy, death, and betrayal from a close friend and fellow elder in the local church who was also our Honduran General Manager. His malfeasance almost bankrupted Mission UpReach and has left us with financial struggles that we are only now just beginning to dig out from under.

I now know that lamenting before God is the way to peace, forgiveness and a closer walk with Him. I don’t have to carry the load of emotions that come with tragedy, death, and betrayal because I can express my unvarnished feelings about those things to Him in a way that leaves me in wonder of His faithfulness. I would ask you to remember us in your prayers. We are on a wonderfully new path that promises great results in the coming year. One thing is clear as we look back over the last ten years; and that is that God has sustained us with “His right hand.” We are both humbled and reassured by His having shepherded us through the difficult times.  We are grateful to God and to you for your friendship, your prayers and your support. Thank you.